If you’re like me, before you leave your home you need to check, and double check, that you’ve got your keys, wallet, and phone. Women do not have this problem because they keep everything they need, and probably a lot more besides, in their handbags.

However, life has just become more complicated, at least for some people, according to a video in a link in an unsolicited email I was sent by a gentleman in Ireland. Unfortunately, he appears to be unaware that I’m not exactly enthusiastic about promoting drug addiction, including e-cigarettes. The company is called Purplebox Vapours. There, I’ve mentioned the name.

The link, a Beginner’s Guide to Vaping, starts with a skit by a comedian called James Corden who demonstrates that when you leave your house it’s not sufficient merely to check you have your keys, wallet, and phone: you also need to make sure you have your vaporiser! That is, if you’re one of the growing number of people who use these drug delivery devices.

Let’s pause for a moment. Why should you take a vaporiser with you when you leave the house? It’s as bad as smokers who would be in a panic if they found they’d left their cigarettes behind. Non-nicotine addicts don’t need to take cigarettes or a vaporiser with them wherever they go; they don’t even need to think about them. And if you’re an ex-nicotine user it’s one thing less to worry about – life’s complicated enough anyway.

The rest of the link reminds me of the Desperate Marketing cartoons in the British satirical magazine, Private Eye. It’s full of banalities:

Leading the way in bringing a healthier alternative to smoking…enjoying e-juice flavours…continue your vaping journey to change your life for the better.

And even:

E-Cigarettes Do Not Stiffen the Aorta That Pumps Blood to Our Hearts

The copywriter evidently is ignorant of biology. It’s the heart that does the pumping; the aorta carries blood away from the heart.

Then there’s a link to a study, breathlessly headlined as E-cigarette Vapour Tested on Human Airway Tissue and Found to be Equivalent to Breathing Fresh Air. The main conclusion is:

Cells were subjected to 6 hours of intensive ‘breathing’, with fresh air, used as the control, e-cigarette vapour and traditional cigarette smoke. Only the cells exposed to cigarette smoke were altered.

Apart from the fact that the study was funded by British American Tobacco, this is meaningless. Let them carry on with the study for a few years and then see what happens.

The whole business of e-cigarettes is a red herring, or in this case we might call it a purple herring. Let me set out the argument simply:

Smoking is dangerous to health. All smokers should stop. It’s widely believed this is very difficult. Therefore many smokers cannot or will not stop. Therefore they need to have a safe, or at least a safer, alternative to smoking. A brilliant invention from China is the answer: the electronic cigarette!

There are a number flaws in this argument: a) Smoking is not difficult to stop – in fact it’s easy if you go about it the right way; b) You don’t need an alternative to smoking; c) It’s unknown whether e-cigarettes are safe – only time will tell. After twenty years or thirty of regular e-cigarette use there could be a public health disaster.

In the meantime, if you want to stop smoking without a struggle, the Symonds Method can show you how.

Text © Gabriel Symonds